I have had far too much fun than is appropriate, for a woman of my age, with a glue gun, glitter spray and sequins.
Mom and I have been creating the most magical fairy tutus, wands and head “gear” for Alathea and my niece, Zuri, for Christmas. And they are practically edible!
I cannot wait to see the girls flitting around the living room in their little outfits on Christmas day {photos to come}.
I have, in the process, rediscovered my passion for the uber-useful glue gun and am racking my brain for ideas and objects I can glue together. And then spritz with glitter. It’s rather pathetic, really.
No, I’m not 8.
Maybe if I schnazzed up the Christmas tree with some glitter spray we could do away with the heinous spider-web-like lametta? Hmmm.
Speaking of ‘the’ tree…I cannot wrap my brain round the fact that tomorrow is Christmas Eve. Where did 2009 go?
And how did so many gifts get under that tree?
I’m floored by the fact that just a month ago I was thinking how “slim'” this Christmas would be in the gift department, taking the opportunity to focus rather on the true reason for the season. And while that focus hasn’t shifted…I’m stunned by the generosity we’ve seen pour in from completely different sources. Even today we received a Christmas card from a woman Joe worked with, that I have met only once {briefly}, with Meijer gift cards inside. Just when my head stops spinning from one random act of kindness, we get hit with another.
We are loving being in a position of “need” as it so perfectly places us in a posture to receive God’s extravagant provision.
Speaking of need, I’m in need of some wisdom!
As mention a few days ago, I’m not feeling quite like myself lately. For the past week or two, I’ve been ridiculously fragile, defensive and emotional. Yesterday Ali spend 2 hours quietly {and at times, not-so-quietly} playing in her bed instead of napping. Aiden decided he didn’t need a nap yesterday afternoon either. An hour before I was schedule to meet some girlfriends I hadn’t seen for a while, I was in desperate need of a shower {having not been afforded the opportunity before then} and my sister decided to hop in. Get this: I broke down and cried when my hubby finally got home and then had to leave again. Because I needed a shower. It appears I need a little more than a shower. Therapy, maybe?
I have no clue what is wrong with me. I’m super emotional, even jealous at times at the silliest little exchanges between loved ones {that don’t include me}, and am painfully aware of my newly acquired super-sensitivity. The last time I dealt with this nonsense was when I was diagnosed with PMDD {Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder} and was on a birth control that was making the emotional toll worse.
The thought of having to go through this – and put my loved ones through this…the walking on eggshells and picking up the pieces – all over again, makes me shudder. It’s actually quite terrifying. I have really enjoyed have a consistent level of sanity and emotional steadiness over the past few years and have no interest in returning to that rollercoaster ride.
So. Need some wisdom as to what to do. I do not like feeling like this, nor do I like picking fights with my husband and sisters over petty things – it’s pathetic. Crying about showers rates pretty low on my list of fun, daily activities, too. And this just isn’t me. I actually really enjoy life, and am pretty good at not sweating the small stuff. But right now, the small stuff is making me cry. Ugh.
But. 2010 is just around the corner. I’ve conquered this beast before. My husband endured it beside me, and he will again, if need me. We’ve been through the wringer this past year, and come our stronger and more confident than ever in the faithful God we serve.
He has most definitely glued us more tightly together through these tough times…and I’m really enjoying the glitter He’s been spritzing our lives with these past few weeks! I’m especially excited for the big, shiny piece of bling in the shape of a shield that will be {re}delivered in 2.5 weeks.
And if all the sweet, small, light-reflecting particles He’s sprinkling on our lives right now are a testament of the love, faithfulness and goodness of a Father to His kids…then bring on the bling!
Ooooh, sparkly!
{Update: still no sweets or chocolate ingested – yay – on purpose, that is. Drank almost an entire cup of tea with sugar today, by accident – sorry, Rebecca, I thought it was mine and was so busy talking I didn’t realize it tasted sweet. No lie. Excited, but not delirious, to have sweets again in a week. Definitely delirious to drink coffee again. Oooh Aaaaah. Already pondering what I need to give up next. This journey is so far from over}
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